The tide pulled the water closer to my feet
He threw his head back
And bellowed
He laughed like the ocean
I sifted the sand through my fingers
Knowing what would happen if
I too
Did not laugh
He tries
I think he does
I know he does
I hope he does
But his heart was as cold as the Hudson River
Maybe even colder
I chuckled
There was no joke
I, like a child;
Asked to go into the water
The sun was setting
Every movie ever told me this was supposed to be romantic
But it’s not
He nods and and I jump up
Slowly walk towards the water
A woman stares at my scars
And all the ways he marked me
He tries
I think he does
I know he does
I hope he does
So I started running
Farther away from him
And closer to God
Or what I hope was God
I ran till my feet could no longer touch the sand
I kept swimming out into pinkness
That water was deeper than snow
Not colder
Just deeper