“No, I don’t, you’re the one who needs to learn that you are so selfish and that you should care about others’ feelings. I liked you Logan, and then, then, you just — ”
Suddenly I looked up. The water was becoming rougher, as the canoe bounced in it swiftly.”
One Day Until:
When I signed up for camp, I didn’t sign up for what happened.
The Morning Of Camp:
I woke up in bed, knowing that this would be the last morning where I would be cushioned underneath, without a sore neck and back. I decided that I needed a good reputation for the first day, so that I could make new friends. I hunted through my closet, ripping everything off the hangers anxiously. I needed something stylish, but not too fancy. I remembered back to the last day of school, this girl named Mary had worn this amazingly cute outfit. These high pants with three buttons, with a flowy white tank top. That was what I was going to try to do.
The only high-waisted shorts I had were a tye-dye blue pair with rugged edges. It could work. In my closet I came across a white V-neck, but I couldn’t wear anything flowy, too fancy. So I slipped the shirt over my head, noticing that it would look cuter if I tucked it in.
Hmmm, shoes? What was Mary wearing again? Right, converse sneakers… I don’t have those. The floor of my closet was filled with shoes, even though I hated most of them. They were either too dirty, too weird, didn’t like them, too old, didn’t fit, too girly, too boyish, wait…
I spotted my pair of black vans, perfect!
I glanced in the mirror, turning my body to view all the angles of my outfit.
“Jamie, come on, we’ve gotta leave!” my mom called.
I closed the door behind me, taking one last look at the room that I wouldn’t see for a while. I kissed my door as a sign of goodbye, and stomped down the stairs.
First Day Of Camp:
Taking tiny steps, I walked into the cafeteria where all the other campers were gathered. The sun created a beam of light peeking through the window. It cast a shadow into the room, creating a vast silhouette of a guy’s figure upon the dented and washed out wooden-colored tables.
“Hello, campers!” said a tall woman, with a sweet, high voice. “You are going to have the best two weeks of your lives here!”
The woman babbled on, when suddenly the most gorgeous sight appeared, matching the shape of the shadow. I’m not talking clothes, I’m talking face, eyes, hair, body, muscles, everything about him was perfect. His eyes were a light blue, they sparkled as he continuously peered around, I could look at them all day. Dimples that seemed to be made of sunshine formed as he laughed at something the woman said. And his arms, bulges of muscles, made his shirt look tight to his skin. His fluffy hair was combed to one side, and his tan face was the most adorable part of him.
Maybe the woman was right, these were going to be the best weeks of my life.
Second Day Of Camp:
“Let’s get up my girlies!” a lady outside my tent hollered in all directions. The next thing I knew she was pulling my blankets roughly off me and clapping repeatedly in my face.
“Girls, line up!” the lady called again, indicating a warning to every tents’ campers.
I stepped out with a yawn and stumbled over to where a straight line of girls was forming. We skipped along a dirt trail until we arrived in front of a lake. It was a lengthy lake, and staring at the calm water peacefully flow, it seemed never ending.
The day was perfect. Fluffy clouds of dreams blended into the dark shaded sky, which had an ombre effect into light blue. It was gorgeous and sent a relaxed chill directly through my body.
“Girls,” the counselor started motioning with her hands as she spoke, “Get with a partner of your choice. Our first activity is canoeing. Don’t canoe that far though. Remember, here at camp the climate changes unexpectedly and frequently, that is why you can’t travel far, just in case. Anyway … ”
I looked around for a partner. I hadn’t come with a friend, and it seemed as if everyone else did. If not, they had already made a new friend. I began to wander to other campsites, when I saw him. Today he looked even more beautiful than the sky. Even better, he also seemed to be looking for someone to work with.
Okay, I whispered to myself, You’ve got this. My head drifting up, I gave him a tiny wave, and a small smirk.
“Hi, um do- you- have- a partner,” I stuttered, trying to stare directly into his distracting, glowing eyes.
“Uh.” Oh my gosh, he had the voice of an angel. “Sure, I don’t have a partner,” he responded, moving closer to me.
“Yes!” I said, a little too loud, “I mean cool, haha.”
Oh my god, Jamie, you’re so weird, why’d you have to say ‘Yes,’ now he automatically thinks you’re odd.
The boy’s smile transitioned to a confused look.
“So, your name?” I asked.
“Oh, right, I’m Logan.” Uh, such a fabulous name.
“Yours?” he followed up,
“Really? That’s my girlfriend’s name!”
With that, I slumped my hands down, and scrunched my eyebrows tightly together, my smile now a frown. It was like a brick just hit my face with immense power.
Noticing my expression he now looked concerned. “You okay Jamie?”
I glared at him angrily, not blinking once. “Jamie?” he said again.
I blinked, snapping back into reality,
“Yeah I’m fine.” My words were delayed and lifeless.
He turned, now resting his hand gently on the top of my shoulder. His touch was like a pure piece of heaven. The soft feelings sent energy back into me, forming another smile. Maybe I just had to win his love?!
As I focused on the softness, perfectness, awesomeness, greatness, and everything about the feeling of him touching my bare skin below my hair, a man began to speak in a low and heavy voice, “Hello campers.”
As he spoke, my head dozed off into the ideal land…
There was a humongous castle built of gold with touches of silver rhinestones, and turquoise metallic window frames built especially for Logan and me. We spent most days in the backyard, tending the garden that contained vibrant colors of sunshine, exposing radiant light into our deepest emotions. And we walked in the park outside our home, we held hands, watching the calm river beside us soothe our inner soul just as Logan was about to kiss my lips, and I…
“JAMIE!” I felt a nudge at my side. I jumped abruptly at the touch. It was Logan.
“Didn’t you hear, we have to get life jackets on and then we have to go to our assigned canoe. Ours is number 23.” He motioned for me as he picked up a bright orange life jacket.
“Turn around,” he asked. I did as he said. I felt the padding of the jacket fit into my shape, and he fastened the buckle. “Tight enough?” he followed up.
“Perfect,” I answered, gazing into his eyes of beauty. They looked bluer than ever against the sky.
“Um, I must’ve missed it, how far do we go out?” I asked, laughing at ease.
“He said to wherever, as long as you can still see the campsite, so I guess not too far.”
“Oh.” I had imagined us in the sight of no other, as we romantically talked about life.
The Start: Canoe Trip
“So do you just want me to row?” he asked.
“Ah, if you want, I’m not very strong, you’re probably better, but if you want me to I can though, whatever you want is good, I don’t care, ya know whatever you want.” Omg, I sound even more weird.
“Okay, I can do it.” He began to firmly pull the paddle back, and I could see his muscles as they flexed through his shirt. He must spend hours working out for strength like that.
For a couple of seconds, silence took over, it wasn’t for that long, but it felt so much longer than it really was.
“So, this is going to get really awkward if we don’t talk,” he finally said, looking down.
“Yeah,” I agreed. “So what’s up?”
“Um, well, to get to know each other, I play soccer!” he began.
“Really, me too!” I shouted.
“So in school last year, I had this crazy teacher. She was our health teacher. Taught me nothing, everything that came out of that woman’s mouth was useless,” I said, changing the topic for some reason. I guess I felt insecure.
“Yeah, I hate those teachers.”
I was tempted to interrupt and say that he doesn’t even understand how boring she was, but he continued, “Talking stress… my girlfriend has really been stressing me out lately.”
I was taken aback from the sudden statement. It was like fresh air was being pumped back into weakened lungs.
“What do you mean?” I followed up, my face bringing complete brightness back into it, as I intently examined his eyes.
“She’s extremely demanding, everything I do has to be perfect,” he sighed somberly.
I expressed concern, but was unsure what to say. “Oh,” I finally blurted.
“Yeah, you’re probably bored, sorry I don’t have to talk about — ”
“No, no,” I cut him off, “It’s totally fine. I get it, sometimes you need to let people know about emotions, like you just gotta talk to somebody. I get that way all the time!” I smiled, giving him a sweet giggle.
“Exactly,” his eyes widened, “Like, I drive her to school in the morning. I told her I would be there at 7:30 and I got there at 7:32 and she cursed me out!”
“What?” I agreed.
“Right? And then because I did that she made me take her shopping and buy her whatever she wanted!” he continued, now getting angry.
“Oh my god, that’s so bad!” I hollered, backing him up, not really focused on him, but his stunning appearance.
“Yeah, and, I don’t know, it’s just annoying!”
I held my hand in front of my eyes, for the sun was cast directly into them.
I guess he noticed. “Here, switch seats with me. The sun’s in your eyes Jamie,” he offered, starting to get up.
“Oh no, that’s really sweet, but it’s okay. You’re already doing all the paddling.”
“Take my glasses at least.” He took his sunglasses off, like they do in the commercials from the designer brands. Now I could see his gleaming eyes. By the tone of his eyes, I could tell that he wasn’t going to give up until I took them, so I slowly grabbed them and placed them gently on my face. The lingering smell of his cologne reached my nose.
“Jamie, I don’t know what to do about the other Jamie,” he kept going.
“Just break up with her,” I suggested, really hoping he liked the idea.
“I can’t. If I do, she’ll spread something about me to the entire school. No joke. She is the most popular girl and so everyone believes her or whatever. I hate it, I mean I know she will do it. It happens every time, she’s already dated three guys this month! Jerry, then Mark, then me. It’s not like she even likes us, she just thinks we’re handsome ‘cause she obviously doesn’t like me. I’ll try to make a joke, but she tells me I’m stupid. She only has boyfriends because she thinks it’s cool. Sorry I’m talking way too much.”
“No it’s all good, Logan,” I said, “but how come you ever asked her out?”
“I didn’t.” Now he was actually mad. “I saw her in the hall and nobody likes her but she’s ‘popular’ so everyone wants her to like them, ya know how it is with all of that?”
“Yeah,” I said, gazing into his gorgeous eyes.
“So anyway, I was in her class and she came up to me and goes ‘nice hair, dude.’ I was like ‘thanks.’ And then the next thing I knew she goes, ‘Pick me up at 8, wear something nice.’ Then she walked away. I had no clue what just happened, but I really didn’t want to go out with her, and then all my friends were like, ‘Dude, you’re crazy, it’s Jamie, the hottest girl and you don’t want to take her on a date…
‘Dude, it’s JAMIEEEE BLANKYYY! You have to go out with her. Dude, she’s hot!’ Brian had said.
‘Yeah, if you don’t go out with her, then I will,’ John had added.
‘Yeah but I don’t like her!’ I kept telling them.
‘Yo, it’s Jamie. Do you Know what She’ll do?! If ya don’t go, she’ll literally ruin your life.’
‘Well I’ll just tell her that I don’t have her address.’ They looked at me strange and I was confused so I go, ‘What?’
John and Brian exchanged looks and seemed scared for a moment.
‘Um,’ John started, ‘Well, you see, Jamie kinda made us give her your number so she’s gonna text you her address.’
“I was really mad and I couldn’t use that as an excuse, ‘cause then I got a text from her. Then I felt really scared if I didn’t go. You see, Jamie always had to have a boyfriend and she broke up with Mark that day, so if I didn’t go on a date with her she would kill me.”
“So did Mark break up with her?” I asked, surprised.
“Yeah, he was like, ‘Jamie, you’re really sweet and so nice of a girl. And I really enjoy being with you but right now I don’t want to be in a relationship. Then she was like, ‘Are you breaking up with me you (beep)!’ Then she kicked him right in his, his, spot, and punched him and then on her Instagram she wrote some pretty mean things about him. He didn’t come to school for a month after and even then he had a black eye. That’s what I’m scared about!”
I stared at him for a moment, thinking about what I could say.
All I could think about was this:
“So when I met you, and I told you my name, Jamie, you sounded … excited. But wouldn’t you be sad to hear that since it reminded you of your girlfriend?” I asked, really desperate for an answer.
He looked at me, and suddenly his face turned the color of a cherry.
“Be-cause, you- seemed really nice, and it gave me hope th-aat, mayb-ee, you could be my girlfriend,” he stuttered, now looking directly down, and stopping the rowing.
I looked at him, ”Ya know, you don’t have to be embarrassed.” I smiled. He faced his eyes up to mine now. Why can’t he be brave? Gosh!
“Look, I saw you and you’re really–” Now my face was red. “You’rereallygoodlook-in.”
He smiled. “I feel like I get that a lot.”
Wow Logan, way to make me feel special. I still liked him by his looks so I continued, “I like you.”
We both glanced at each other and didn’t know what was next. Finally he put out his hand. I lay mine on top of his.
“I-I-I likeyoutoo,” he said.
I put my hands out, giving him a hug. It didn’t seem right. I quickly stopped and got off of him.
“Wait,” I said, my eyes watery, “What about … the other Jamie?”
“What about the other Jamie?” I repeated.
He rolled his eyes sorrowfully.
“I don’t know. Our hopes are over. I can’t be with you. I don’t even live near here.”
“Where do you live?” I asked, waiting desperately for answers.
“California.” Wow, that was far from New York. Why didn’t he tell in the beginning?
“Well, we can text can’t we?” I suggested.
“Jamie, it won’t work.” He shook his head.
“Well, why can’t we try?” I asked, wondering why he was just giving up like this.
“Jamie, just stop, it’s over. We’ll have a nice two weeks, and then we’ll be done.”
My mouth lay wide open. “Are you kidding me? You’re just gonna give up on me like that?” I was furious.
“Jamie, I do like you, but we can’t be together, it isn’t practical,” he repeated, totally not looking at me.
I was mad. I had dreamed about him. I literally was set on Logan.
“Logan, I sat here listening to your stupid stories about your girlfriend that you obviously want more than me. And now you’re just giving up on me.”
I could tell he was trying extremely hard to stay calm. “Jamie,” he raised his voice, his eyes now staring into mine, “I like you and you are a nice girl. And you really have encouraged me to break up with — with the other Jamie. If you didn’t want to hear the stories, you could’ve stopped me. You told me to keep going. And I really do — I — do — I — I — like you, but I can’t be with you, I just can’t, you know it wouldn’t work. But I just want to let you know that you have allowed me to build up courage. When I go back to California the first thing I will do is break up with Jamie. So thank you for that.”
“Yeah, no prob.” I sarcastically smiled. “Ya know what you taught me? … That you can’t lay eyes upon someone and plan your future from there. You need to get to know them better.”
Now I looked deathly into his eyes. “And you’ve taught me that even if you like the looks of people, turns out they’re nothing like you EXPECT,” I raised my voice. “They will give up on you! That’s what I learned. So thanks soooo much for that LOGAN!”
I smacked my hand on the side of the boat.
We sat there in silence.
“I know you’re mad, but you have to get over it — ” he began.
“No, I don’t, you’re the one who needs to learn that you are so selfish and that you should care about others’ feelings. I liked you Logan, and then, then, you just — ”
Suddenly I looked up. The water was becoming rougher, as the canoe bounced in it swiftly. I turned and saw a mountain at our side. I stared up at it, and it seemed as tall and menacing as Mount Everest.
He moaned, facing up to the sky as the cloud rolled into a darker and more eerie gray
“Where are we?” I asked. My heart pumped faster now, and my eyes were not blinking.
The wind picked up and soon we were headed in the opposite direction. With all his strength, Logan pulled eagerly at the water, the paddle quickly moving. His face wrinkled and his eyes seemed to clench together. Suddenly — crack — the paddle snapped.
I felt a drop of liquid slide down my arm. Looking up, I now saw what was to come.
Rain fiercely trembled down, pounding harshly in the boat. I was drenched within seconds. Through all of this, I managed to stand up and firmly roar, “I wish I never met you Logan!!!”
Trying to sit back down, the wind struck me, and I smashed my head on the boat.
All I remember is, “Jamie, Jamie, JAMIE!!! Are you okay? I’m sorry.”
I squinted through one eye.
“Jamie, keep your head upward.”
I weakly put my hand to my head and absorbed a wet, thick stream of blood as it continuously flowed down the side of my head. I remembered back to my crazy teacher last year. I knew that she had said something about a specific amount of blood that leads to death. With the agonizing pain, I was sure this was too much blood.
I felt a slight nudge then. “Jamie, I like you.”
It’s too late now, I thought. This is all Logan’s fault, and he knows it.
I could see a tear floating down Logan’s cheek, and his eyes full of the deepest sorrow. Finally, he feels the pain that I have dealt with this whole time.
His hand gently brushed my arm after a quiet kiss on the lips. My head soon felt no pain at all and my eyes went blank into whiteness.
When I signed up for camp, I didn’t sign up for this.