“My mother was a dragon! Why did the assassin kill her? Why did the assassin like it!?! I thought, And what am I???”
Hello, my name is Stupid. I need to find a key in a hhhiiilll (which means mountain). So I hired an assassin to kill a blimp man so I could use the blimp.
As I was flying, the assassin got on his own ship and tried to shoot the blimp with a bazooka. My blonde hair blackened as he scored a hit. I flung myself at the key of truth which would save us all.
I hit the spiky mountain and blood sprayed from my chest. I climbed and climbed until my vision blurred. My life…was…nearly over…but…I…must…get it!
All of a sudden I was healed and a large dragon stood before me.
“Hello, I am Frostbite of the six dragons, you have freed me. Free the rest of my kin with the next key on Mount Buttox,” boomed the dragon. Then it flew away.
I looked far into the distance and I saw a butt hhhiiilll. I ran down my hhhiilll and I saw the assassin with his red glowing eyes.
“I…I…I…w…wiill…k…k…killl!!!” muttered the assassin…
“W…well I’ll make sure you don’t!” I shouted as he charged at me.
“I HAVE THE KEY!” I shouted and the key turned into a shield. The assassin bounced back as he hit my shield.
“♈(aries)!!!” I said as I swung at him with my fist. KA-POW!!!! The assassin went flying away…
“Y…you…d…d…don’t know who raised you, do you…?”
“What are you saying!!?”
“I…I killed your m…mother…the dragon…AND I’M PROUD OF IT!!!”
Then he vanished…
“WWWAAAHHH!!” I cried.
My mother was a dragon! Why did the assassin kill her? Why did the assassin like it!?! I thought. And what am I???
Then a thought occurred to me.
“I’M a DRAGONBORN!!!” I shouted, and all of a sudden I felt a little different, like I had scales…wait, I’m a dragonborn. Duh.
Anyway, I got to Mount Buttox and a giant bat loomed over me…and a butt killed the bat in two seconds as I drilled underground.
I found a strange man who said that he was “the doctor” and he also said that I needed to kill a…that was as far as he got, because all of a sudden he disappeared and I was alone in the gray, dark cave.
A strange voice floated around, saying “kkiiilll.” And then the world went dark.
When I awoke I was in a dark, dark cave.
“Dddiiieee!!!!” I jumped out of the way but my leg was pierced by an arrow and it bled…a lot.
My attacker was a strange demon and he roared with fury at missing. It started stinging me on the neck, I thought I was done for, but then I saw a key!!!
I grabbed hold of it and I was healed again. With the last of my strength I thrust the keys at the creature and they turned into swords and it killed the demon.
”Looks like we’re safe.”